...

I feel as if the biggest mistake in my life was meeting you, so I say goodbye. I turn my back on everything and rather have a moment of pain than a lifetime of hurt. It’s not that I don’t care; it’s the fact that I care too much. Think of anything you want for my lips are now forever shut. No longer will I speak of you and how I feel about you, no more memories of you, no more flashes of what we used to do, no nothing. It’s hard but I will erase these feelings in hopes that one day I can talk to you without thoughts running rampant in my head: what if… why not… I wish… what could have been. This may sound cruel, harsh, and absurd, and I apologize. Know that you were never wrong, you had done nothing wrong, you were just being you. That is why I've fallen for you but now I let go. Remember that I’m not leaving our friendship behind forever I’m just saying goodbye until these feelings no longer linger.

To unemployment and beyond!

I shall be counting the remaining days of my employment; and at the same time, shall be looking for better job opportunities. By better, I do not refer to the salary or whatnot, but I pertain to the advancement or growth I will have to garner as a working individual. What better job opportunities there are I am referring to? Teaching? With the lack of education units, I hope to be qualified or be given chance by some schools to exercise what I am passionate of doing. Administrative/Clerical? If circumstances permit, I will have utilized what I learned in college (seminary). Media/Communication/Arts-related? I would certainly go the distance for this even if it would let me undergo series of trainings to hone any skill I might possess just to be "good enough" for this field. Or shall I just go ahead and further my education? With this option, I am beleaguered by the thought that I should already be financially equipped to fund my studies because the mandatory parental educational support has ended that moment I walked down the aisle and received that Latin diploma. So I guess I will have to venture on the vast outside world again and be one of those young hopefuls trying to fit in the so-called corporate world. I surely am very thankful to that first and only company I applied and without second thoughts, accepted and hired me. So long, vCustomer Philippines Inc., that 6-month stay was fun! STATUS YET TO BE CHANGED TO: Unemployed and it's complicated. :)

Mi Primer Deseo en esta Navidad

I dream to completely read all of Paulo Coelho's books, and collect them after I finish reading... He is my idol! Well, one among many, I believe. I never read an entire book or novel in High School. My thing before was start reading a book and end up not finishing it. I never really had the persistence to read. But in college, when I was locked up in the monotony of seminary life, I found bliss in reading. It was there where I finished reading my first book. All because I had more time, all because we were encouraged to read, all because I preferred to read novels than philosophical books, all because I needed to break that monotony, all because I had no choice. And from there, I already enjoyed reading -- it widened my imagination, it gained me more vocabulary, it inspired me. I have become more equipped all for the love of reading! :) #NonsenseBlog101

Love VS. Vocation

Do all fairytales always have princes and princesses living happily ever after? Not all. Let us read on a fairytale where princesses and queens are left behind… a fairytale where the princes are in search for their lifetime partner.
Welcome to the kingdom of the seminary… where the characters deviate from the normal flow of the times.
These princes are those valiant young men trying to pursue the road which only a few dare to go. People call us “seminarians”. We are formed to become holy and chaste religious and priests someday. Holiness is a great deal in our world. And so is chastity. Every human structure inside the seminary is looking forward to these. But can he resist the pleasures the world offers? There enters the conflict. People see us as perfect beings, invulnerable from sin. This is one thing that needs to be elucidated here.

WE DO FALL IN LOVE.
Everyone experiences that mutual feeling of falling in love. Seminarians are in no immunity. We get struck by the arrow of cupid most of the time. We seldom see women with stunning faces. And once we find one who really gratifies us and who has an overly pleasing personality, we could not help but fall.

DON’T GET US WRONG!
Our being seminarians does not make us emotionless creatures like robots. We are still humans who emotions and feelings. These we cannot really deny. There were many instances in the past where seminarians left the seminary because they realized that they were not meant for religious life. And yes they did not regret their decisions. Everyone who enters the seminary is not yet assured that he would go out as a successful priest. Now and again, the seminary would become an avenue for one to truly find himself.
In the seminary, it is never a sin to fall for someone. What makes falling in love wrong is when a seminarian already wants to settle into a relationship with the woman he loves. Seminarians will always be boys. And boys will forever have links with girls.

BUT WE HOLD BACK THIS EMOTION…
Being men in formation we ought to curb this liking towards the opposite sex. This is so to avoid future disturbances when we already become priests and religious. We cannot afford to add more dilemmas to our Mother, the Church. We do not totally detach ourselves from the world outside for no one can really escape from the reality. And in our future ministry, we will still go back and be immersed to the world. What is meant here is that instead of entertaining the thought of being in love, we are to diffuse this love to other people who are more in need. All we need is prayers that little by little we grow to be holy and chaste formands. And that, just like any other fairytales, we arrive to that happily-ever-after ending with the lifetime Partner we have sought for, chosen and fought for, God.

this is what we call life...

i declined in my academics...
OKAAY. here is the deal... the new year has started and like when i stepped back in the seminary, i again adjusted. but this time with more pressures.
the second semester has just started and like i really am in crisis of our subjects. Metaphysics is a pain in the ass. Like, the subject is student friendly but the way our professor delivers the lessons to us is like killing me. i only have to read and read on the textbook. my grades are decreasing. im left out. my classmates are like doing well.

in the like manner, the weather here in baguio city is freezing cold. we even reached a temperature rate of like 8 degrees -- thats during noontime. see how much colder would it be during dawn? haha. but its okaay. others say that it will become colder on february. im afraid.! hahaha. im already having two blankets when i sleep but still they dont suffice.

other issue is this... we are making our baby thesis and it was a good thing that i get to be familiar of the procedures of the research. thanks High school alma mater. haha.

i only have 2 remaining months as a second year. and hopefully, next sem, il be donning my habit. im having my fingers crossed and praying for a good result of the year-end evaluation. please do pray for me too.

i already missed many celebrations in cebu. debuts of my friends, birthdays, gatherings, reunions, sinulog and more. i sometimes think that if i had not entered here in the seminary, i could have attended all these events. but nonetheless, im happy with my life now. my life now is a mixture of tears and smiles, hopes and fulfilled dreams, doubts and confirmations. so what more could i ask for? i have chosen this kind of life, i should be held responsible for this.

til then friends. i so missed the blogging times i used to have. im gonna make it up to you all.

Make It Last

A colorful array of talents highlighted the 4th day of the 6th Recollect Augustinian Youth Summit – the cultural night. Who said that only the seminarians had talents to be shared? Our delegates also shared the talents of their own.
Different talents – singing, dancing, acting, miming – were showcased which proved that the delegates were not just ordinary students in their schools. The delegates from SAA, Bayawan and USJR, Basak danced their very own festivals: Tawo-tawo in Bayawan and Sinulog in Cebu. The presentations of the delegates from CSR, Trece Martires, Cavite; SSCR, Canlubang; SSC-R Manila were different. They did the miming, and the audience was all in awe. Everything turned out well as expected.
And we were down to our last day together…
Despite the blissful cheers shouted by the delegates during the cultural night, the feeling of sadness and the wanting to make this experience last forever were already very evident in their faces. Time ticked so fast that many did not realize that the 6th RAY Summit was almost over. As the experience of parting ways neared, all were set to pray for one another and to reminisce the wonderful moments they shared with each other. Who knew, one day, the paths of seminarians and delegates would cross again. No one would know nor tell, all simply needed to believe, hope and pray.


Bro. Marlone Manuel P. Viagedor
21 November 2009 -- 3am
5th day 6th Recollect Augustinian Youth Summit

is it getting worse?

days are becoming busier.

i will post on september 1. just posting here for the month of august.
6 days for a week-end?
lol. i think that's awesome. we didnt have classes starting august 27 'coz of the celebration of the feast of our mother, St. Monica. also on the 28th, we didnt have classes due to the Toma de habito which coincided the solemnity of our Father, St. Augustine. and saturday and sunday, the week-end. august 31, we all know, is national heroes day, so another rest day. and lastly, september 1, BAGUIO day! no classes and we are allowed to go out WITH GADGETS. lols.

pagpasensyahan nyo na ang blog na toh.
ciao!